Just some random thought at midnight

Tomorrow is likely to have typhoon no . 8 hoisted, and I just don’t feel like studying for HUMA1000 quiz.

These days have been pretty much bus, as midterm goes.

 

After a whole month, my life has changed drastically.

Literally,

Completely changed.

I went to see a clinical psychologist, though she didn’t mention out literally, but I think is kinda obvious that I get diagnosed with depression. (plus my knowledge on depression lol)

Obviously get this because how I was being raised. High pressure, elitism, MBA teaching style. Whatsoever.

Have been thinking from time to time.

Why. Me.

Always try to think the answer given by the psychologist: to teach my parents.

But I am just exhausted. I just need a break.

Half year is not long, nor short. Not sure if I can get through it.

From that day onwards, I have never considered myself as lucky anymore. There’s always a trade-off between things that you possess throughout your life. I get what many people want, superficially, studying in prestigious school, can play numerous sports and music, above average language skills……But I’d rather be a normal average kid, if I have a choice.

I was told that I’m sensitive, but I think sometimes I’m just oversensitive. And life gets hard with this, cause I’m always suspicious or concern something.

 

Haven’t been alone for quite some time since roommate Venus is back from Taiwan, so depressed has not visited, not until just now. Throwback to a week or so, I haven’t been really experiencing life, showing much of my emotions. I maybe angry inside, but I just hide it somewhere else again. Also when I’m with others, just feel like I have been wearing a mask and pretend I am happy. Sarcastic.

But I simply can’t imagine how can I show my bad temper in front of others.

 

Just gonna admit the fact that I’m bad tempered.

Mom, Dad, sorry, I can’t be your good girl anymore. (though I’m already not as good as before)

Just some random thought at midnight

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